The Nightmare Transcends Baseball

Bad enough watching my team tank like Bear Stearns
With nothing to do about Hafner and Byrnes
I'm afraid of stagnation - team's too weak for freefall
And now it's got problems besides just baseball

See the keyboard I'm using links to an eMac
A machine I purchased about three years back
Today a Firefox upgrade was auto-installed
But sometimes on the old, the new won't work at all

Some might say, "Get a new one", to that I say, "Please.
I haven't even paid my fantasy season fees."
In most circumstances I do not speak that way
But writining rhyming might control what I say

So now the browser that I am using is Safari
Which seems to be slightly less outdated than Atari
And it won't let me change any players on my team
Which makes is hard to end this awful waking dream

As for my my team's performance, there's not much to say
There were only four games that were played yesterday
That stats accumulated were basically dirt
And Guillen is day to day, hope he's not badly hurt